Time to call a spade a spade. After the latest doping incident and subsequent arrest of yet another Tour rider, I'm wondering, is anyone watching Le Tour anymore? I tuned into Versus' coverage last night and listened to a rather lethargic Bob Roll sounding like he'd lost his best friend as he was doing his best to comment on the action. Both announcers sounded like they would rather be anywhere else but in front of the camera calling the farce this race has become.
I became a Tour de France follower during Lance Armstrong's third effort at winning. As a person who lost his weight cycling, I must admit I was smitten with the romance of the race. Spending 20 miles in the saddle on a Saturday afternoon, I could only imagine the pain of riding over 100 miles a day for 21 days, all around France. No wonder cyclists look like skeletons. Here I was (am), still over 200 pounds, and riding a mountain bike for an hour or two. How in the world do these guys do it, day in and day out? Maybe dope has something to do with it.
Fast forward to last year, when so many big-name cyclists were caught doping and then banned from competition. And now the Tour is facing more controversy as cyclists continue to tempt fate and take enhancing drugs in order to survive the race.
One can only wonder how much longer this classic race, that has taught average Americans so much about the geography and beauty of France, can last. I haven't seen the telecast ratings for Versus' exclusive coverage, but one can only ascertain they cannot be good. Only the most ardent fan would stick around after all that's happening to disgrace the Tour.
Give me the pure sport of baseball anytime. Wait, bad example. Give me the good, clean sport of football...whoops. Okay, the Olympics, give me the Olympics...well, I guess there's not many sports out there that hasn't been touched by doping, but it sure seems Le Tour has more than its fair share and the lackluster attitude of its commentors is enough to tell you the real story.
That's all from the "drug-free" Fat Runner!
TFR
Friday, July 18, 2008
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Retire Already, Brett!!!
Picture this: a tearful middle school art teacher, sitting in front of his peers who are surrounding him in the cafeteria. He's given 30 years of faithful service and now it's time to call it a career. There's a cake on a table and a few gifts from well-wishers. The man of the hour now stands and thanks everyone for all the great memories and the wonderful gifts. There's some applause, even from some of the first-year teachers that don't even know this old geezer. There are a few whispering under their breaths, "It's about time he left." The moment ends and this tired, old educator walks out of the school forever. Or maybe not.
Two weeks later, with his contract days expired, and everyone is well into their summer vacation, the sad and aging art teacher calls his boss and says we need to get everyone back together. "I want to stay another year...I'm not ready to retire." Of course, driven by the letter he received from the Teacher Retirement System showing him his monthly retirement check may buy him a cup of caramel machiatto at Starbucks and a blueberry bagel...and that's a big maybe, he's decided to stick it out one more time. Who cares if he hasn't done any real teaching the last 5 years of his career. It doesn't matter if he had little to no classroom discipline to speak of for quite a while. But, he did manage to bring it in what he, and his boss, believed would be his swan song finale; a year in which he did more teaching, changed more lives, and generally improved more as an educator than he did in his 30-year sojourn at Anywhere Middle School.
His boss, tapping a pen on a desk, politely reminds him his time is over. His retirement papers have been submitted and it's out of his hands. "But, I don't want to leave. I want to stay!" "Too late," says the principal, "I've already hired your replacement." Then it hits the old guy like a bat to the face. Life goes on. They missed me for about three minutes and they (staff) got back to their lives. Summer is here and everyone's gone. This guy is just a memory. The kids probably won't even notice his absence in August when the new, fresh, pretty girl that will take his place is standing outside the art classroom welcoming her new students.
Hey Brett Favre! You played a pretty good, Hall of Fame career, but you're about to make everyone sick. In fact, if you look at Favre's stats he lost as many games as he won for the Pack by forcing bad throws and getting picked off in crucial moments. That's how I remember his final game with Green Bay. It's time to take a look at Dan Marino and gracefully take your exit. Granted, more people will miss you than the jerk Marino, but it's time to let someone else take the reins. You're holding up the process of indoctrinating another quarterback into the offensive system and that's not fair. Your time has come and gone and now you must move on.
Retire, already, Dude. Enjoy time with your now healthy wife and get on with your life.
TFR
Two weeks later, with his contract days expired, and everyone is well into their summer vacation, the sad and aging art teacher calls his boss and says we need to get everyone back together. "I want to stay another year...I'm not ready to retire." Of course, driven by the letter he received from the Teacher Retirement System showing him his monthly retirement check may buy him a cup of caramel machiatto at Starbucks and a blueberry bagel...and that's a big maybe, he's decided to stick it out one more time. Who cares if he hasn't done any real teaching the last 5 years of his career. It doesn't matter if he had little to no classroom discipline to speak of for quite a while. But, he did manage to bring it in what he, and his boss, believed would be his swan song finale; a year in which he did more teaching, changed more lives, and generally improved more as an educator than he did in his 30-year sojourn at Anywhere Middle School.
His boss, tapping a pen on a desk, politely reminds him his time is over. His retirement papers have been submitted and it's out of his hands. "But, I don't want to leave. I want to stay!" "Too late," says the principal, "I've already hired your replacement." Then it hits the old guy like a bat to the face. Life goes on. They missed me for about three minutes and they (staff) got back to their lives. Summer is here and everyone's gone. This guy is just a memory. The kids probably won't even notice his absence in August when the new, fresh, pretty girl that will take his place is standing outside the art classroom welcoming her new students.
Hey Brett Favre! You played a pretty good, Hall of Fame career, but you're about to make everyone sick. In fact, if you look at Favre's stats he lost as many games as he won for the Pack by forcing bad throws and getting picked off in crucial moments. That's how I remember his final game with Green Bay. It's time to take a look at Dan Marino and gracefully take your exit. Granted, more people will miss you than the jerk Marino, but it's time to let someone else take the reins. You're holding up the process of indoctrinating another quarterback into the offensive system and that's not fair. Your time has come and gone and now you must move on.
Retire, already, Dude. Enjoy time with your now healthy wife and get on with your life.
TFR
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
10 Reasons Running is Better Than Reality TV
My wife is a devotee of reality television. I can't stand it. I find reality TV boorish and completely devoid of any intelligence, much like some parts of the United States. Strangely, a lot of what happens on these stupid programs have filtered into my brain through osmosis, since I sit in the room adjacent our living room while on the computer. I can tell you a little bit about each one my wife watches, from America's Next Top Model to Hell's Kitchen. Isn't Gordon Ramsey the King of Tact?
I've been a runner for nearly a dozen years and pounding the pavement is my "reality." These shows are as far removed from "reality" as I am from actually becoming America's Next Top Model. The following is a list of 10 reasons running is better than reality TV:
10) At the end of my run I don't have three judges telling me how bad my form was.
9) My "catwalk" has cobblestones and is covered with trees.
8) I know I run better than David Hasselhoff can act and I'm not that fast.
7) My runs have never been "a little pitchy, dog."
6) I run to zone out wretched noises like the ones that come from Mary Murphy.
5) Sometimes there are more interesting freaks on the road than on TV...now that's reality!
4) There are no running reality shows on Bravo yet.
3) I "make it work" and my legs look good for doing it.
2) Hell's Kitchen is running on a July day in my neighborhood.
and, the number one reason running is better than reality TV...
1) No Simon Cowell!!!
I'm sure there are hundreds more reasons but 10 will have to do.
TFR
I've been a runner for nearly a dozen years and pounding the pavement is my "reality." These shows are as far removed from "reality" as I am from actually becoming America's Next Top Model. The following is a list of 10 reasons running is better than reality TV:
10) At the end of my run I don't have three judges telling me how bad my form was.
9) My "catwalk" has cobblestones and is covered with trees.
8) I know I run better than David Hasselhoff can act and I'm not that fast.
7) My runs have never been "a little pitchy, dog."
6) I run to zone out wretched noises like the ones that come from Mary Murphy.
5) Sometimes there are more interesting freaks on the road than on TV...now that's reality!
4) There are no running reality shows on Bravo yet.
3) I "make it work" and my legs look good for doing it.
2) Hell's Kitchen is running on a July day in my neighborhood.
and, the number one reason running is better than reality TV...
1) No Simon Cowell!!!
I'm sure there are hundreds more reasons but 10 will have to do.
TFR
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