2008...can you believe it's already here? This time two years ago, my wife and I were sitting next to my daughter's bed, wondering if she would awake from a coma. We were on day four of her unconsciousness and had ridden a wild roller coaster of emotions as her condition would worsen and then improve only to regress. I still call December 31, 2006 and those wee hours on January 1st the darkest time of my life.
By the early morning of New Year's Day '06, I had poured my heart and soul out to God in a last desperate attempt to beg for my child's life. It was only after I realized that God is God and I am not did things begin to happen. At a little after 6:00 am, Melissa opened her eyes. She recognized and acknowledged everyone around her bed. It was indeed a miracle. She couldn't speak for the ventilator tube in her throat. Her body was wired to every imaginable type of IV and monitor. It had been a frightening, harrowing 5 days and I never want to go through that again.
A godly man would've dropped to his knees and resolved right then and there to live a life above reproach until his last breath. But I didn't. I paid my lip-service "homage" to God, promising him I would change. I thanked him in words but not in actions. Since my daughter's awakening our lives have been nothing short of turbulent and most of it is my fault.
Rather than acknowledge God's greatness and the gift I'd received by getting my daughter back, I still went on my way trying to control my life, instead of giving it to the Lord. I worried about money and how we would pay all these hospital bills. The fact Melissa would need insulin and supplies every three months would now place a weight on my heart. I ran up our credit card to pay bills and get the meds she would need. And I worried and passed that along to my family. I know I've made Melissa feel guilty about being a type-1 diabetic, like it was her choice. I've not been the man my family and my God calls me to be.
It's time for me to fulfill my promises to God, my family, and myself. For starters, I must make time for all three. God needs all of me, not just my words. He needs my time, my heart, and my actions. He needs me to be in his word to learn more about what he's asking of me. The same is true for my family. They need a godly man to lead us, not some wimp that complains about everything.
As for me, I've got to put aside the things that really don't matter and focus on following God and taking care of my family. Control is something I don't give up easily, but if you look at my life you'll quickly see I have no control over anything. If you examine your own lives you'll see the same is true. God is in control. He is God and we are not. He hung the stars and made the universe and didn't need my help.
So, my resolution is to be the son of God I was created for, to love my family, to live life to the fullest, and quit worrying about things.
As usual, I'd like to lose a few pounds and maybe run a half-marathon, or two. And, I'd like to start a new career. I pray new windows open and I can leave my present job and begin a new one. But I'll leave that to God.
God bless you all and Happy New Year!!!
The Fat Runner
Monday, December 31, 2007
Sunday, December 30, 2007
What's Wrong With the Cowboys?
After watching today's loss at the hands of our bitter rivals, the Washington Redskins, I think all of us in the Cowboy world are starting to wonder what's going on. Speaking from a purely Dallas Cowboys' fan perspective, I'll give you my take on what's happening in Big D.
1) It took a while, but the rest of the league, specifically the NFC, have begun to figure out the Cowboys' offense. Tony Romo has had some shaky moments behind center this year. Even with his many miscues, he remains with the top passers in the NFL. That should give some indication of just how talented Romo is. With that being said, the Cowboys are spending way too much time throwing here lately. That leads me to the next point.
2) Run the football. The Cowboys have two incredibly gifted running backs, each possessing their own unique abilities to move the football. The dilemma, and it's a good one, is the Boys have TWO equally talented backs. At some point, in my opinion, Dallas will have to make the difficult decision to make either Julius Jones or Marion Barber the featured back. As Dallas O is becoming predictable and the rest of the NFC are catching up, Dallas is going to have to make the move to give one of these guys the nod. I choose Barber because of his uncanny ability to finish a run straight ahead. It's like having two QB's, which Dallas had back when Landry ran Morton and Staubach in and out on successive plays. Eventually you have to choose your guy and I think it's time for Marion the Barbarian to get his chance.
3) Uncreative play-calling. I love Jason Garrett. He was an outstanding back-up behind Troy Aikman and who could forget his memorable performance against the Packers years ago? He's proven himself as a very capable offensive coordinator and he'll only get better with time. Someday he will be the head coach of the Cowboys. For some reason, he's starting to look more like Ernie Zampese. He's in love with Romo's arm. I'd like to see him move the pocket more and start the game on the ground by pounding Barber until someone stops him. I think the Cowboys are too quick to camp on the pass and abandon the run. As John Madden says..."To win a championship, you have to run the football."
4) We're all right. Yeah we lost to Philadelphia and Washington in the last three games of the year, but we've still got home-field advantage throughout the playoffs and a bye in the first round. The Cowboys simply need to get everyone well, put together a solid game-plan and get out there and execute it. Cut the stupid penalties, control the line of scrimmage on both sides of the ball the way they have when they dominated Green Bay earlier, and take care of business. Don't listen to the media when they say you're great or when they think you're sliding. Keep Jessica out of the stadium, although the whole team must've been infatuated with her that day. Play Cowboys football the way you know how and get us back into the Super Bowl.
We love our football here in Texas and for us Cowboys fans, we live and die with them. I've always said there's no more fair-weather fan that a Cowboys fan. We're like Yankees followers, without the pinstripes. People love to hate us and that's just fine.
My hope is in late January we'll all be saying nothing's wrong with the Cowboys as they head for another Super Bowl.
Next, we'll discuss what's wrong with the NFL. There's plenty to talk about there.
Enjoy the postseason everyone!
TFR
1) It took a while, but the rest of the league, specifically the NFC, have begun to figure out the Cowboys' offense. Tony Romo has had some shaky moments behind center this year. Even with his many miscues, he remains with the top passers in the NFL. That should give some indication of just how talented Romo is. With that being said, the Cowboys are spending way too much time throwing here lately. That leads me to the next point.
2) Run the football. The Cowboys have two incredibly gifted running backs, each possessing their own unique abilities to move the football. The dilemma, and it's a good one, is the Boys have TWO equally talented backs. At some point, in my opinion, Dallas will have to make the difficult decision to make either Julius Jones or Marion Barber the featured back. As Dallas O is becoming predictable and the rest of the NFC are catching up, Dallas is going to have to make the move to give one of these guys the nod. I choose Barber because of his uncanny ability to finish a run straight ahead. It's like having two QB's, which Dallas had back when Landry ran Morton and Staubach in and out on successive plays. Eventually you have to choose your guy and I think it's time for Marion the Barbarian to get his chance.
3) Uncreative play-calling. I love Jason Garrett. He was an outstanding back-up behind Troy Aikman and who could forget his memorable performance against the Packers years ago? He's proven himself as a very capable offensive coordinator and he'll only get better with time. Someday he will be the head coach of the Cowboys. For some reason, he's starting to look more like Ernie Zampese. He's in love with Romo's arm. I'd like to see him move the pocket more and start the game on the ground by pounding Barber until someone stops him. I think the Cowboys are too quick to camp on the pass and abandon the run. As John Madden says..."To win a championship, you have to run the football."
4) We're all right. Yeah we lost to Philadelphia and Washington in the last three games of the year, but we've still got home-field advantage throughout the playoffs and a bye in the first round. The Cowboys simply need to get everyone well, put together a solid game-plan and get out there and execute it. Cut the stupid penalties, control the line of scrimmage on both sides of the ball the way they have when they dominated Green Bay earlier, and take care of business. Don't listen to the media when they say you're great or when they think you're sliding. Keep Jessica out of the stadium, although the whole team must've been infatuated with her that day. Play Cowboys football the way you know how and get us back into the Super Bowl.
We love our football here in Texas and for us Cowboys fans, we live and die with them. I've always said there's no more fair-weather fan that a Cowboys fan. We're like Yankees followers, without the pinstripes. People love to hate us and that's just fine.
My hope is in late January we'll all be saying nothing's wrong with the Cowboys as they head for another Super Bowl.
Next, we'll discuss what's wrong with the NFL. There's plenty to talk about there.
Enjoy the postseason everyone!
TFR
Practice Safe Blogging
Have any of you ever clicked on the "Next Blog" link at the top of your page? Well I did and Holy Cow! I started checking out some other blog sites and it was cool, at first. After about the 5th or 6th click a porn site came up and it was horrible. I couldn't believe it.
I thought maybe this was just a hazard of the internet and maybe it was just a random thing. So, I kept browsing and clicking and another porn site, masked as a blog page, blasted across the screen.
Has anyone else experienced this? I wonder, and I'm being naive, if the creators of this blogging network knows this is happening. If so, it's wrong and shouldn't be allowed to happen.
I hope you all practice safe blogging as you venture into the cyberworld, sharing your thoughts and ideas on the world-wide web.
Good luck to you all and I'll talk to you before the new year.
TFR
I thought maybe this was just a hazard of the internet and maybe it was just a random thing. So, I kept browsing and clicking and another porn site, masked as a blog page, blasted across the screen.
Has anyone else experienced this? I wonder, and I'm being naive, if the creators of this blogging network knows this is happening. If so, it's wrong and shouldn't be allowed to happen.
I hope you all practice safe blogging as you venture into the cyberworld, sharing your thoughts and ideas on the world-wide web.
Good luck to you all and I'll talk to you before the new year.
TFR
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Happy Bowl Season?
At 43, I can remember sitting on the floor as a boy, watching the Big Four of college bowl games. Of course, we watched the Rose Parade first thing that New Year's morning. Then, if I recall correctly, the Cotton Bowl, with Lindsay Nelson and Paul Hornung calling the action, kicked off at around noon, followed by the granddaddy, the Rose Bowl, on ABC, then it was off to New Orleans and the Sugar Bowl, and the last game was the Orange Bowl on NBC.
Now I can't exactly remember when the Gator, Peach, Independence, and Sun Bowls began, but I do remember watching them with my dad, so I know they've been around for a while.
Even with the addition of the Fiesta out in Tempe, college football still maintained its identity and control over the quality of play in "major" bowl games.
But along came the decade of corporate sponsorship back in the late 80's and into the 90's and every Tom, Dick, and auto parts store wanted and got its own bowl game. In fact, my friends and I like to make up names for bowl games since they've gotten so ridiculous.
How about the Starbucks Coffee Folgers Dixie Cup Liberal Bowl? Or, The New Mexico Green Chile Tortilla Posole Soup.com Bowl? Try it...it's a lot of fun and would make a great game. We could call it "Name the Bowl Game" game.
My best friend says it doesn't matter. It's football so he watches the games. Unless I'm a real fan of whoever is playing I probably won't pay much attention to the game until it's the major ones in January. I can't imagine the NCAA, ESPN, and the sponsors of some of these ludicrous-sounding fiascos bringing in a big wad of cash from the dozens that are bored enough to tune in.
My point is this. Number One: bring a playoff system to Division 1 college football and, as an ESPN analyst suggested, use the top bowl games as game sites while rotating one bowl game as the national championship. Makes way too much sense, right? Number two: get rid of some of these boring bowl games that make absolutely no difference or impact on the final rankings. I heard a head coach argue that it is exposure for his kids that they might not otherwise get. If only a handful are watching then it's still little exposure. No one cares about the highly-hyped "Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl or the much anticipated Emerald Cashew Mixed Nuts Bowl." Sorry.
I'm a football purist and really don't give a flip about a lot of these games and don't get me started on the NFL. Like the NCAA they have sold out the fan to make another buck to hide in their burgeoning war chest. The NCAA is sending mediocre players into a league that is chock full of mediocrity. All of this is a mirror of a whiney society that doesn't believe in winners or losers and wants to counsel boys every time they get a scratch or don't get picked for the team.
Bring back the best of the best and realize not EVERYONE gets to participate the way little leagues have done. We don't need 32 bowl games. We need 7-8 quality games and a playoff system that will give the smaller-market teams a chance to participate.
Well, with that being said, I'm off to watch the Stop-n-Pop/Truck Stops of America/Gas and Blast/Toot-n-Totum Car Care Central/Allsup's Bean Burrito Bowl. I hope my team wins.
Let me know what you think.
Happy bowl season!!!
TFR
Now I can't exactly remember when the Gator, Peach, Independence, and Sun Bowls began, but I do remember watching them with my dad, so I know they've been around for a while.
Even with the addition of the Fiesta out in Tempe, college football still maintained its identity and control over the quality of play in "major" bowl games.
But along came the decade of corporate sponsorship back in the late 80's and into the 90's and every Tom, Dick, and auto parts store wanted and got its own bowl game. In fact, my friends and I like to make up names for bowl games since they've gotten so ridiculous.
How about the Starbucks Coffee Folgers Dixie Cup Liberal Bowl? Or, The New Mexico Green Chile Tortilla Posole Soup.com Bowl? Try it...it's a lot of fun and would make a great game. We could call it "Name the Bowl Game" game.
My best friend says it doesn't matter. It's football so he watches the games. Unless I'm a real fan of whoever is playing I probably won't pay much attention to the game until it's the major ones in January. I can't imagine the NCAA, ESPN, and the sponsors of some of these ludicrous-sounding fiascos bringing in a big wad of cash from the dozens that are bored enough to tune in.
My point is this. Number One: bring a playoff system to Division 1 college football and, as an ESPN analyst suggested, use the top bowl games as game sites while rotating one bowl game as the national championship. Makes way too much sense, right? Number two: get rid of some of these boring bowl games that make absolutely no difference or impact on the final rankings. I heard a head coach argue that it is exposure for his kids that they might not otherwise get. If only a handful are watching then it's still little exposure. No one cares about the highly-hyped "Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl or the much anticipated Emerald Cashew Mixed Nuts Bowl." Sorry.
I'm a football purist and really don't give a flip about a lot of these games and don't get me started on the NFL. Like the NCAA they have sold out the fan to make another buck to hide in their burgeoning war chest. The NCAA is sending mediocre players into a league that is chock full of mediocrity. All of this is a mirror of a whiney society that doesn't believe in winners or losers and wants to counsel boys every time they get a scratch or don't get picked for the team.
Bring back the best of the best and realize not EVERYONE gets to participate the way little leagues have done. We don't need 32 bowl games. We need 7-8 quality games and a playoff system that will give the smaller-market teams a chance to participate.
Well, with that being said, I'm off to watch the Stop-n-Pop/Truck Stops of America/Gas and Blast/Toot-n-Totum Car Care Central/Allsup's Bean Burrito Bowl. I hope my team wins.
Let me know what you think.
Happy bowl season!!!
TFR
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Serious Blogging
It's no secret I'm trying to turn blogging into a full-time job. Help me make this a reality. If you would share my blog with your friends and ask them to share it with others, that would be a huge step toward fulfilling my goal.
Recently I learned about advertising on my blog site. I'm intrigued by the possibilities that presents. I love writing and sharing useful information and would love for my blog to become a network where others respond and share their insights.
If you can think of other ways to make my blog more successful, please share them with me.
2008 is going to be an exciting year--I can just feel it.
I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas holiday and had lots of fun with family and friends. Write and share your thoughts, ideas, and experiences with me.
God bless you!!!
TFR
Recently I learned about advertising on my blog site. I'm intrigued by the possibilities that presents. I love writing and sharing useful information and would love for my blog to become a network where others respond and share their insights.
If you can think of other ways to make my blog more successful, please share them with me.
2008 is going to be an exciting year--I can just feel it.
I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas holiday and had lots of fun with family and friends. Write and share your thoughts, ideas, and experiences with me.
God bless you!!!
TFR
Monday, December 24, 2007
Merry Christmas to All
It has been a long year. Back when 2007 began, I asked God make this my best year ever.
January began with me contracting a bacterial infection in my stomach that put me down for nearly a month. In March, my youngest daughter, whose depression reached its pinnacle, fell completely apart and was hospitalized with high blood sugars and to treat her mounting depression due to her diabetes and the all the problems it created for her. Then, this same kid slammed into two vehicles, totaling them and hers. Thankfully she wasn't seriously injured.
Just when we thought things were going to calm for our family, my oldest daughter, home from college, was struck by an oncoming car as they both tried to beat the light at the intersection just down from our house. She was seriously injured and wound up with a severe staph infection in her leg that lingered for two months.
The fall and October brought the death of my stepfather who had been recently diagnosed with cancer and had fought a lifelong battle with diabetes. Indeed, there would be many that could say 2007 hasn't been a great year for my family.
But, let's count the blessings, shall we? Yes, my youngest was in deep depression, couldn't sleep for months, and did go to the hospital. She has since been hospitalized twice from complications related to her diabetes. And, she was involved in a three-car accident. Still, she managed to graduate from high school a semester early, has managed her blood sugars beautifully in the last three months of the year, and is already enrolled at our local college where she plans to be a nurse. Blessing one.
Alicia, my oldest, survived her t-boning and lived to walk away from it. Her leg healed and she decided to enroll at a university just a few miles from our city and is now working on her teaching degree. She works two jobs, attends school full-time, and pretty much pays for everything she gets. I'd say she's done pretty well for herself. Blessing two.
While my stomach continues to be a chronic issue, it has made me pay more attention to my diet and self-care. I realize no one will take care of me but ME. All our health issues have made me more keenly aware of the importance of nipping problems before they surface. Blessing three.
My stepfather dying was unexpected and quite a blow to all of us, but it has brought us all together as a closer unit. Thanksgiving was lighter and tonight our Christmas Eve dinner will have more meaning since he won't be there with us. My mom and youngest nephew both have attended church functions with us. I continue to leave the invitation open to my sister, but that's up to her. The fact remains our family is growing closer together. Blessing four.
All of these things have helped me face the little crises with a different perspective. Last week, we had a hot water leak in the hallway by our living room. My wife just began to bawl at the thought of a plumbing bill that might be in the thousands since our home is built on a concrete slab. We both understood at that moment this could be a huge dent in our pocketbooks. But, somewhere, and I believe it was God, I summoned the courage and said, "It'll be all right. It's only money." I said a prayer that evening that God would send us an angel in the form of a plumber with a big heart. He did just that. We needed a new water heater and he fixed the leak. Eventually, the cost was $1500 under my guess-timate. What a tremendous blessing!
Praise God for all the opportunities he's presented me and my family with this year. We've had a chance to grow in our faith as it has been tested so fervently over the past two years. God has created a family of battle-hardened, crisis managers that are willing to fight Satan at every turn and will not fly the white flag in any situation. This is the greatest blessing we received this year.
Rather than look at the bad and flee, we assess the threat, break it down, and stand and fight. We praise God when it's good and praise him when it's bad, because it's never that bad. We have the assurance of eternal life with him and that's all I need to know.
My life is good. 2007 has indeed been my best year ever. On December 31, at 11:59 pm, I will pray that God makes 2008 my best year ever. New Year's Day will be the two-year anniversary of my daughter's survival from the most traumatic event of her life--a coma. What a great way to start my best year ever. To remember my daughter's rebirth and why I am blessed beyond measure.
God bless you all and may 2008 be your best year ever.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a great year!!!
The Fat Runner
January began with me contracting a bacterial infection in my stomach that put me down for nearly a month. In March, my youngest daughter, whose depression reached its pinnacle, fell completely apart and was hospitalized with high blood sugars and to treat her mounting depression due to her diabetes and the all the problems it created for her. Then, this same kid slammed into two vehicles, totaling them and hers. Thankfully she wasn't seriously injured.
Just when we thought things were going to calm for our family, my oldest daughter, home from college, was struck by an oncoming car as they both tried to beat the light at the intersection just down from our house. She was seriously injured and wound up with a severe staph infection in her leg that lingered for two months.
The fall and October brought the death of my stepfather who had been recently diagnosed with cancer and had fought a lifelong battle with diabetes. Indeed, there would be many that could say 2007 hasn't been a great year for my family.
But, let's count the blessings, shall we? Yes, my youngest was in deep depression, couldn't sleep for months, and did go to the hospital. She has since been hospitalized twice from complications related to her diabetes. And, she was involved in a three-car accident. Still, she managed to graduate from high school a semester early, has managed her blood sugars beautifully in the last three months of the year, and is already enrolled at our local college where she plans to be a nurse. Blessing one.
Alicia, my oldest, survived her t-boning and lived to walk away from it. Her leg healed and she decided to enroll at a university just a few miles from our city and is now working on her teaching degree. She works two jobs, attends school full-time, and pretty much pays for everything she gets. I'd say she's done pretty well for herself. Blessing two.
While my stomach continues to be a chronic issue, it has made me pay more attention to my diet and self-care. I realize no one will take care of me but ME. All our health issues have made me more keenly aware of the importance of nipping problems before they surface. Blessing three.
My stepfather dying was unexpected and quite a blow to all of us, but it has brought us all together as a closer unit. Thanksgiving was lighter and tonight our Christmas Eve dinner will have more meaning since he won't be there with us. My mom and youngest nephew both have attended church functions with us. I continue to leave the invitation open to my sister, but that's up to her. The fact remains our family is growing closer together. Blessing four.
All of these things have helped me face the little crises with a different perspective. Last week, we had a hot water leak in the hallway by our living room. My wife just began to bawl at the thought of a plumbing bill that might be in the thousands since our home is built on a concrete slab. We both understood at that moment this could be a huge dent in our pocketbooks. But, somewhere, and I believe it was God, I summoned the courage and said, "It'll be all right. It's only money." I said a prayer that evening that God would send us an angel in the form of a plumber with a big heart. He did just that. We needed a new water heater and he fixed the leak. Eventually, the cost was $1500 under my guess-timate. What a tremendous blessing!
Praise God for all the opportunities he's presented me and my family with this year. We've had a chance to grow in our faith as it has been tested so fervently over the past two years. God has created a family of battle-hardened, crisis managers that are willing to fight Satan at every turn and will not fly the white flag in any situation. This is the greatest blessing we received this year.
Rather than look at the bad and flee, we assess the threat, break it down, and stand and fight. We praise God when it's good and praise him when it's bad, because it's never that bad. We have the assurance of eternal life with him and that's all I need to know.
My life is good. 2007 has indeed been my best year ever. On December 31, at 11:59 pm, I will pray that God makes 2008 my best year ever. New Year's Day will be the two-year anniversary of my daughter's survival from the most traumatic event of her life--a coma. What a great way to start my best year ever. To remember my daughter's rebirth and why I am blessed beyond measure.
God bless you all and may 2008 be your best year ever.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a great year!!!
The Fat Runner
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Daisies Grow In Darkness
All was quiet as the young girl pretended to be asleep. She had said a prayer he wouldn't return. She kept mumbling to herself, over and over the same words, "Please don't let him come, please don't let him come." But he did. Night after night.
The smell of alcohol on his breath would stain the girl's memory. It was a nightmare. When she ought to be fast in slumber after a bedtime story and good night kiss, she found herself terrorized instead, waiting each night for the inevitable.
This little girl, whose stepfather would wait until everyone was in bed and all was still, would lie shivering as he made his stealthy, evil walk to her bed where he would ravage her childhood. It all began at age five and didn't end until she was near her teens.
Each time he finished taking another piece of her happiness, he would whisper, "If you tell your mom, she won't believe you." Oh, how many times she wanted to tell. Her heart screamed from within, but no one ever heard it.
Finally, after a few years had past, the girl summoned the courage to tell her mom the dreadful news. And just as her dad had prophesized, her mom called her a liar. That night, he paid another noctural visit and afterward, with whisky fresh on his breath, he uttered, "I told you so."
It took her older sister to finally come forward and support her story, and later two cousins to share the times he had tried to hurt them. The little girl's mom threw her stepfather out and the madness stopped.
Years would pass, but the horror remained vivid in her mind. Every night when she curled up to sleep, she would wait for the sound of the creaking door as it opened, but it didn't. She was never really sure if he was gone or if it was just a dream.
In time, this girl would grow to be a woman and embark on a quest to fulfill her dream of becoming a teacher. She left home and moved far away to attend college. "Out of sight, out of mind," she thought. 300 miles from home gave her some measure of security.
It was while she in college she met her future husband. She called him her "Knight" and "Savior." What she didn't know is he felt the same way about her.
You see, I'm that little girl's husband. She rescued me from myself and didn't even realize it. I remember her waking up in the middle of the night, startled and shaking. I'd jump and ask, "What's wrong?" She would breathe a sigh of relief and say she heard a noise that sounded all too familiar. It was the wind--maybe God's breath--reminding her he was there and so was I and she didn't have to worry anymore.
My wife grew to be a brilliant, fragrant daisy. They say plants need plenty of sunshine and water to survive. But my daisy grew in darkness, emerging strong and vibrant.
She's a teacher now and lives her dream. I get to live mine every day, too. I should say I get to live WITH mine each day.
My daisy grows in God's light and reflects that everywhere she goes. She still carries with her the painful memories of her shattered childhood, but she has taught me a valuable lesson about forgiveness, which is something she made a point to tell her dad before we got married. She let him know he was forgiven and I've never seen a man hurt as bad as he did that day.
If she can forgive him for something like that, then I can forgive others for lesser offenses.
She's my daisy. From darkness into the light she grew and from the light she shines.
TFR
The smell of alcohol on his breath would stain the girl's memory. It was a nightmare. When she ought to be fast in slumber after a bedtime story and good night kiss, she found herself terrorized instead, waiting each night for the inevitable.
This little girl, whose stepfather would wait until everyone was in bed and all was still, would lie shivering as he made his stealthy, evil walk to her bed where he would ravage her childhood. It all began at age five and didn't end until she was near her teens.
Each time he finished taking another piece of her happiness, he would whisper, "If you tell your mom, she won't believe you." Oh, how many times she wanted to tell. Her heart screamed from within, but no one ever heard it.
Finally, after a few years had past, the girl summoned the courage to tell her mom the dreadful news. And just as her dad had prophesized, her mom called her a liar. That night, he paid another noctural visit and afterward, with whisky fresh on his breath, he uttered, "I told you so."
It took her older sister to finally come forward and support her story, and later two cousins to share the times he had tried to hurt them. The little girl's mom threw her stepfather out and the madness stopped.
Years would pass, but the horror remained vivid in her mind. Every night when she curled up to sleep, she would wait for the sound of the creaking door as it opened, but it didn't. She was never really sure if he was gone or if it was just a dream.
In time, this girl would grow to be a woman and embark on a quest to fulfill her dream of becoming a teacher. She left home and moved far away to attend college. "Out of sight, out of mind," she thought. 300 miles from home gave her some measure of security.
It was while she in college she met her future husband. She called him her "Knight" and "Savior." What she didn't know is he felt the same way about her.
You see, I'm that little girl's husband. She rescued me from myself and didn't even realize it. I remember her waking up in the middle of the night, startled and shaking. I'd jump and ask, "What's wrong?" She would breathe a sigh of relief and say she heard a noise that sounded all too familiar. It was the wind--maybe God's breath--reminding her he was there and so was I and she didn't have to worry anymore.
My wife grew to be a brilliant, fragrant daisy. They say plants need plenty of sunshine and water to survive. But my daisy grew in darkness, emerging strong and vibrant.
She's a teacher now and lives her dream. I get to live mine every day, too. I should say I get to live WITH mine each day.
My daisy grows in God's light and reflects that everywhere she goes. She still carries with her the painful memories of her shattered childhood, but she has taught me a valuable lesson about forgiveness, which is something she made a point to tell her dad before we got married. She let him know he was forgiven and I've never seen a man hurt as bad as he did that day.
If she can forgive him for something like that, then I can forgive others for lesser offenses.
She's my daisy. From darkness into the light she grew and from the light she shines.
TFR
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
In Hot Pursuit of God
With Christmas rapidly approaching, and now finding myself engrossed in plumbing repairs that are approaching $2500, it's easy to look at God as my own personal Santa.
Let me clue you in on a piece of information. God's last name is NOT Kringle. He doesn't wear a red suit and he doesn't exist for me to call on when things are going bad in my life. You see, for most of my adult life I have treated God just like a mall Santa. If things were going my way, I rarely called on him. When my wife was hit with a stroke two years ago, I cried and partially blamed him for letting that happen. Then, in the same calendar year, that December my youngest daughter went into diabetic coma and should've died. For four, agonizingly painful days, I saw little hope and felt my heart grow darker each day. It took the fourth day of her coma for me to bottom out and give her back to God. She awoke and right then and there I came to an understanding that God is God and I am not.
As I sat and pondered my plumbing woes this afternoon, something hit me. My wife has really struggled with faith issues these last two years. She's a victim of sexual abuse when she was a child, then endured a stroke, and went through watching her daughter almost die. Every time we have another health issue or financial setback, it's easy for her to take it out on God. What struck me today, and God discusses this concept over and over again in the Bible, (depending on your translation) is that I really am in a marriage relationship with the Lord.
For better or worse, richer or poorer, sickness and in health, no matter what, I am his and he loves me in spite of my shortcomings. In our society, given the wretchedly horrible numbers of divorced in America, most people seem to have selective hearing when it comes to vows. They only hear better, richer, and health. When it comes to worse, poorer, and sickness it's time to throw up their hands and quit.
There's a great quote in the movie, "Facing the Giants" in which the head coach is calling his team to aspire to something greater as they had lost some key games. He tells them, "We praise him [God] when it's good and praise him when it's bad." How apropos!
I'm in a covenant relationship with God, just as Abraham was. Even when things are bad, I give praise to God. At least I have a home that has plumbing. I have a nice vehicle, a job, two healthy kids, and a tremendously faithful wife that I DO NOT deserve! God never promised sunshine, flowers, and rainbows. He did promise Adam life would be hard after he banished him from the Garden.
So, as I'm faced with my own personal "giants," I will praise him in good times and bad, better or worse, richer or poorer, sickness and in health 'til death do I join him in all eternal splendor.
My life is a journey and like the LAPD on Cops, I'm in hot pursuit...of God.
That's my confession. What's yours?
May God bless you!!!
TFR
Let me clue you in on a piece of information. God's last name is NOT Kringle. He doesn't wear a red suit and he doesn't exist for me to call on when things are going bad in my life. You see, for most of my adult life I have treated God just like a mall Santa. If things were going my way, I rarely called on him. When my wife was hit with a stroke two years ago, I cried and partially blamed him for letting that happen. Then, in the same calendar year, that December my youngest daughter went into diabetic coma and should've died. For four, agonizingly painful days, I saw little hope and felt my heart grow darker each day. It took the fourth day of her coma for me to bottom out and give her back to God. She awoke and right then and there I came to an understanding that God is God and I am not.
As I sat and pondered my plumbing woes this afternoon, something hit me. My wife has really struggled with faith issues these last two years. She's a victim of sexual abuse when she was a child, then endured a stroke, and went through watching her daughter almost die. Every time we have another health issue or financial setback, it's easy for her to take it out on God. What struck me today, and God discusses this concept over and over again in the Bible, (depending on your translation) is that I really am in a marriage relationship with the Lord.
For better or worse, richer or poorer, sickness and in health, no matter what, I am his and he loves me in spite of my shortcomings. In our society, given the wretchedly horrible numbers of divorced in America, most people seem to have selective hearing when it comes to vows. They only hear better, richer, and health. When it comes to worse, poorer, and sickness it's time to throw up their hands and quit.
There's a great quote in the movie, "Facing the Giants" in which the head coach is calling his team to aspire to something greater as they had lost some key games. He tells them, "We praise him [God] when it's good and praise him when it's bad." How apropos!
I'm in a covenant relationship with God, just as Abraham was. Even when things are bad, I give praise to God. At least I have a home that has plumbing. I have a nice vehicle, a job, two healthy kids, and a tremendously faithful wife that I DO NOT deserve! God never promised sunshine, flowers, and rainbows. He did promise Adam life would be hard after he banished him from the Garden.
So, as I'm faced with my own personal "giants," I will praise him in good times and bad, better or worse, richer or poorer, sickness and in health 'til death do I join him in all eternal splendor.
My life is a journey and like the LAPD on Cops, I'm in hot pursuit...of God.
That's my confession. What's yours?
May God bless you!!!
TFR
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
The Miracle of Life
We take so many things for granted in life. The sun rises and paints the east a fiery pink hue and then creates a golden glow as it sets for the night. Our kids come in and out with barely a word and maybe, if we're lucky, we get in a quick "I love you" as they fly out the door and out of sight. And what about the way the leaves turn and fall as we move from fall to winter? And then the miracle of the renaissance of spring. For us teachers, that means summer is right around the corner. Ahhhh, summer and then rest.
I guess the one thing I do take for granted is just the mundane, day-to-day moments of living that become so routine. Take our friends, for example.
A little over two weeks ago, my friend and fellow high school church group leader, Roman, experienced something no husband should have to endure. His wife Melissa, 37 and an instructor at a community college 50 miles from her home, was on her way to work when the unthinkable happened. At around 7:30 am, she fell asleep at the wheel. Her SUV flew off the well-traveled Texas highway she was on, struck an embankment, flew over 100 feet in the air, and then flipped multiple times, coming to a rest with the nose of the vehicle pointing downward. Thankfully, Melisssa was wearing her seatbelt; however, it was wrapped around her neck and strangling her.
No one knows for sure how long she was there before a trucker saw the smoke and called 911. When the Texas DPS trooper reached her, she was unconscious, bleeding, and not breathing. It was minutes before the local volunteer fire department and ambulance arrived. Realizing the extreme gravity of the situation, the LifeFlight helicopter was called from Amarillo. Meanwhile, firefighters used the jaws of life to extract Melissa from her mangled truck. From all the accounts I have heard, it was unbelievably bad.
Melissa was flown to the county hospital trauma center in Amarillo and taken immediately to surgery. She had massive swelling of the brain and the doctor told her husband she had little chance of survival. By the time I got the news in an email at work she had been in surgery for several hours. She made it through the procedure but her prognosis for full recovery was very grim.
By the time I reached the hospital that evening, the word was better, but still uncertain. For the first time since my own daughter opened her eyes after being in coma for 4 days, I felt like I could help someone through a similar circumstance. I asked Roman if he was tired of answering the same questions over and over again. He chuckled nervously as he hugged me and cried. At that moment all I could think about was my wife and how I would feel if I lost her. I've been down that road too when she had a stroke coming out of knee surgery two years earlier.
God has placed before me some amazing, life-altering events that have shaped my life. I never asked to be a counselor, but God has given me that ability through the traumatic happenings within our family.
As I look at my family, friends, colleagues, students, and neighbors I believe God is telling me to quit taking things for granted and to count the many blessings I've received. I don't deserve to have a warm home, or nice truck, or good clothes, or even the job I so often can't stand. But God has given me those earthly possessions to teach me to be a good steward. But more importantly, he wants me to be a good steward of my relationships and to never just brush them off.
Melissa is now awake, alert, and talking. She recognized and responded to her kids and husband when she first awoke, which is nothing short of a miracle. Perhaps the most eerie occurrence in this whole period happened the other day when Roman, along with several friends, visited the sight of the accident for the first time. He saw the tire tracks and the impact zone and final resting place of the SUV that fateful morning. As his eyes scoured the scene and tears welled in his eyes he noticed something half-buried in the dried tire tracks. It was a card that had fallen out of Melissa's truck and was stuck in the ground. The card had on it from Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know I the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
If that doesn't give you chills...nothing will. Don't take anything for granted. Especially not the power of God. He has plans for us, just as he has plans for Melissa.
God bless you all with safety and security.
TFR
I guess the one thing I do take for granted is just the mundane, day-to-day moments of living that become so routine. Take our friends, for example.
A little over two weeks ago, my friend and fellow high school church group leader, Roman, experienced something no husband should have to endure. His wife Melissa, 37 and an instructor at a community college 50 miles from her home, was on her way to work when the unthinkable happened. At around 7:30 am, she fell asleep at the wheel. Her SUV flew off the well-traveled Texas highway she was on, struck an embankment, flew over 100 feet in the air, and then flipped multiple times, coming to a rest with the nose of the vehicle pointing downward. Thankfully, Melisssa was wearing her seatbelt; however, it was wrapped around her neck and strangling her.
No one knows for sure how long she was there before a trucker saw the smoke and called 911. When the Texas DPS trooper reached her, she was unconscious, bleeding, and not breathing. It was minutes before the local volunteer fire department and ambulance arrived. Realizing the extreme gravity of the situation, the LifeFlight helicopter was called from Amarillo. Meanwhile, firefighters used the jaws of life to extract Melissa from her mangled truck. From all the accounts I have heard, it was unbelievably bad.
Melissa was flown to the county hospital trauma center in Amarillo and taken immediately to surgery. She had massive swelling of the brain and the doctor told her husband she had little chance of survival. By the time I got the news in an email at work she had been in surgery for several hours. She made it through the procedure but her prognosis for full recovery was very grim.
By the time I reached the hospital that evening, the word was better, but still uncertain. For the first time since my own daughter opened her eyes after being in coma for 4 days, I felt like I could help someone through a similar circumstance. I asked Roman if he was tired of answering the same questions over and over again. He chuckled nervously as he hugged me and cried. At that moment all I could think about was my wife and how I would feel if I lost her. I've been down that road too when she had a stroke coming out of knee surgery two years earlier.
God has placed before me some amazing, life-altering events that have shaped my life. I never asked to be a counselor, but God has given me that ability through the traumatic happenings within our family.
As I look at my family, friends, colleagues, students, and neighbors I believe God is telling me to quit taking things for granted and to count the many blessings I've received. I don't deserve to have a warm home, or nice truck, or good clothes, or even the job I so often can't stand. But God has given me those earthly possessions to teach me to be a good steward. But more importantly, he wants me to be a good steward of my relationships and to never just brush them off.
Melissa is now awake, alert, and talking. She recognized and responded to her kids and husband when she first awoke, which is nothing short of a miracle. Perhaps the most eerie occurrence in this whole period happened the other day when Roman, along with several friends, visited the sight of the accident for the first time. He saw the tire tracks and the impact zone and final resting place of the SUV that fateful morning. As his eyes scoured the scene and tears welled in his eyes he noticed something half-buried in the dried tire tracks. It was a card that had fallen out of Melissa's truck and was stuck in the ground. The card had on it from Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know I the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
If that doesn't give you chills...nothing will. Don't take anything for granted. Especially not the power of God. He has plans for us, just as he has plans for Melissa.
God bless you all with safety and security.
TFR
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